• leena dhawan

Who is the MOST IMPORTANT person in your family?

Updated: Jan 17

Recently, we had gone for a family holiday and even mom accompanied us. Kids were enjoying themselves on beaches ... eating heartily... having great time. And out of nowhere my younger one got upset AGAIN,

we did not stop the car to buy something that he wanted. And then we parents joined started consoling him and distracting him to other things, food etc. Mom was quietly watching this struggle of us, the new-age parents.

After a while, seeing that I was alone, mom said; "Don't you think something is wrong?" We also took care of the kids and we have done a fairly good job. But we were not helpless in front of the children. Think about it."

Mom left, but the question she had raised kept coming back to me.

Something is really wrong somewhere.

We do observe kids creating scene during family functions, sometimes despite of having many toys they just don’t look “Happy”. They have lost on the joy of NOVELTY to this era of abundance.

And every time the blame is given to just one thing – PARENTS DON’T SPEND TIME WITH CHILDREN.

So here is the data - According to one study, mothers now spend almost twice as much time with their children and fathers nearly four times as much time as their parents did fifty years ago.

So what's going wrong?

The thought was running through my mind and I came across an interesting article written by John Rosemand, a parenting expert.

He asked a simple question to parents – WHO IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN THE FAMILY?

And the common answer by parents was – Our child is the most important one to us.

He then goes on saying that off late parents end up prioritizing their children the most …sometimes even above themselves. This priority or this status is not earned by children, rather they get it by default.

Therefore, before understanding "RESPONSIBILITY", they understand "RIGHTS" and that’s makes them self-centred.

For the world outside - RESPONSIBLE person is the MOST IMPORTANT person; such as General in army or CEO in corporate. And this awareness is crucial.

Today, parents want to prepare their children for the career goals but they miss on a very important thing – They first need to create a SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE person.

John Rosemond’s thoughts compelled me to introspect. Over the years priorities have changed, today’s lifestyle way different than what it was in 80’s; but the certain definitions of good and bad are almost the same. So while evolving to new age parenting, it is worth to ensure that BASICS are intact.

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