Before you yell at your kids | Parenting tips
"Amartya ... Aryan, go for a bath. It's getting late.” I was going on and on... This had become an everyday story by now. But even after so much yelling and screaming, children were glued and so was the daddy dearest!
I gave up and went for the shower. I got ready for work, finished having breakfast and situation was still the same.
"Say something to them, they are not listening to me" - I said to my husband.
He gave that cold smile… (A smile, that boils my blood)
I was getting late for my meeting, so decided to leave. But my mind was still hovering around the situation … “How do I make them listen to me without this everyday tamasha?” . As usual, the marketeer in me stepped up to give a helping hand.
It’s like this… Ground rule of communication is "If there is nothing new in your product or in your message, then there must be something new in its representation that will attract the attention of the customer."
Like that mind-blowing campaign of close-up toothpaste "Kya aap close-up karte
BINGO!! I was proud of myself
Thought of something and decided to implement it the very next day.
When the children got up as usual, I decided to tell them something that they were not expecting me to tell… "Nobody will enter the bathroom today to take a bath."
Like a reflex, both of them stood up against me to 'take a bath'.
Yuppieee!! I gave a victorious smirk to hubby as I walked by.
Even he gave an appreciative look while warning me that - "idea is good but will not work every day"
Phewwww!!! He was right for a change.
I indeed needed a permanent solution … not only on the issue of bathing, but even otherwise to avoid the daily screaming and yelling at kids.
During this time I happen to come across a book - "Calm parents, Happy kids". I tried a hack from this book which kind of worked and still working.
The book says that today's generation prefers choices over directions. They love freedom.
I worked on this “INSIGHT” and started giving them choices and not instructions.
E.g. Do you want to take a bath now or in ten minutes? Would you like to eat first or complete homework?
Children's response was much better and my irritability decreased drastically.
It is always easy to shout at children, but it is also ineffective. Because then children's attention is drawn to the way we tell them, not to the action we expect, and then they prefer to ignore it. So to get a desired response it is better to understand the nature and inclinations of the child, respect his/her individual freedom, and then set our expectations.